


Dethroned

by InevitableBladders (TheTimelessChild0)



Series: Omovember 2020 [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Embarrassment, Omovember 2020, Thor (2011) - Freeform, Urination, bladdershy loki, inconvenient situation, omovember 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:47:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27228349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTimelessChild0/pseuds/InevitableBladders
Summary: Stormbreaker v. Icebreaker- who will win?
Series: Omovember 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1987816
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	Dethroned

Loki was having _a lot of_ fun. And that was including all the stabbery. 

The Destroyer was casting Hellfire from Hel onto all the pitiful little Midgardian houses. They were quaint, but not needed, except to make a point. What that point was, he had no idea. No matter.

He sent a particularly strong blaze towards his brother personally, who ducked under it as if pulled by an invisible hammer.

Odinson the younger could almost _feel_ the heat from the throne. Which was when he _actually_ felt an odd tickling sensation. Mild, but no less _present_. It indicated a desire to switch thrones.

_Bugger_.

Thor noticed the steel colossus was moving more slowly, more calculated. And the bursts of fire were decreasing in length. 

He ran to Jane’s aid, pulling her and Darcy to safe haven. 

“What does your brother think he’s doing?” Jane asked.

“He’s not thinking. It has been known to happen,” the God of Thunder stated. 

He couldn’t help wondering what had led him to change his tactic so abruptly.

The Destroyer continued through the streets of Puente Antiguo, tracking his victims.

It threw away boxes, trashcans, and cars in its path. Thor peeked around the corner. 

It was moving very oddly _indeed_. Very slowly, very carefully, not using the feet to kick away obstacles, or stepping over it, as the range of movements should technically allow, in both theory and practice.

The metal monstrosity stomped loudly. The Asgardian listened. There was something puzzlingly familiar about the pace, the rhythm, the manner. Then it stopped. The stomping moved to just the left foot. Then the right foot. 

“Is he dancing?” Darcy frowned.

“Who? My brother or his delegate of demolition? As it is, they’re linked. The signals from the pilot control it, whether they be direct or...not,” Thor explained, pausing.

The behaviour was mimicry. If the Destroyer was doing _that_ , then Loki was doing the same sitting. _Hmm._

Thor ran his fingers through his hair exhaustedly, smiling fondly. At least one thing hadn’t changed.

The Destroyer leaned on a wall, crossing its legs in a way that suggested it was ready for battle. 

Its opponent, however, was no longer frightened.

“Do not fret, nor be fooled. He is not capable of moving,” he assured the ladies.

This annoyed Loki. He steered the tin soldier forward, but got a sharp singe of protest, summoning a supplementary squeeze. On Earth, that translated to a tumble forward, and a roll. When it revealed its front to the mortals, Thor sighed. _Silly snake, stupid sibling, stubborn and spiteful and seconds from soiling himself!_

“Do robots pee?” Darcy wondered, making a correct observation.

“No, but Asgardians do,” the God answered, approaching his appointed enemy.

“Same goes for Frost Giants. Though I suppose you know that by now,” he quipped at his brother.

The Destroyer sat up and aimed its arm at him, threatening to fire. But it did not. 

“What’s the matter? Got cold feet?” Thor asked sarcastically.

“You really should have been paying more attention during our lessons, little brother. Though I suppose paying attention to your body was difficult enough... _back then_ , that is,” he remarked, hintingly

“If you had listened, you would be able to recall the most basic rules of combat. Firstly; to take care of your needs beforehand, so to not be caught in a weak position later. And secondly, to respect your opponent, and never pick a fight with someone already in disfavour,”

“I will, on the other hand, supply your lack of Asgardian wisdom with some from Earth. An ancient adage that acknowledges that when one has got to go, one goes. It is often cited along with the word _Time Out_. Which is what I’m pronouncing for your benefit, brother. Now, depart to your dormitory and urinate. I can’t go anywhere even if I wanted to,” 

Thor held up his hands. The Destroyer took its arm down, and hung its head.

“Did you hack it with space magic or something?” Darcy pondered.

“Did you beat it?” Jane inferred, more sophisticated.

“No. Bathroom break,” he stated.

“I told you to go at the coffee house,” Jane lectured, rolling her eyes.

  
“And I did, do you really not remember? That is not, to whom I am referring,” Thor smirked.

“Oh, well, when you gotta go, you gotta go,” Darcy shrugged.

“Precisely. Pity it is not taught on Asgard. Possibly because most of my people don’t need that pointed out. _Repeatedly_ ,” he remarked, adding the last part in a lower register.

* * *

Back on Asgard, Loki removed his hat, and put his hand between his legs instead. It was unlike a dog and its tail, although the only thing the Jotun feared was humiliation. And wetness. Lots of wetness. He stood up, and unwound his legs. With confidence, he attempted to focus solely on the toilet, but found it increased his plight. His brother blessed him with the time to hold on a little longer. He managed to bear the immense pressure from his private area, and barrel forward, barely holding onto a single inch of his outfit.

A sprint, a few quick steps and a slam of a door later, Loki was safely situated, standing in front of the toilet, unzipped and steadily aiming. It was utmost fortuitous that the castle was empty. For there had never been sighs more orgasmic than that of the Frost Giant’s relief. In the very end, he had to check his hand for signs of transformation. The shiver caused, created considerable concern. But there was nothing. No cold, moist feelings anywhere...at all.

The End.


End file.
